Hi reader,
My name is Oakley Phoenix, but I generally go by Oak. There are two other Oakleys at my university, and calling myself Oak is the easiest way to differentiate.
I use they/them pronouns, but I prefer it if you can just call me by my name. Thank you for being here. I’m a nineteen year college student working three on-campus jobs with a major and a double minor. (I agree. That is too much for one person.) I write for theoaknotes in my limited downtime, but it is well worth the late nights and early mornings.
I write because I have stories that haven’t been told before. I am trans nonbinary, mixed black and white, queer, the child of two moms, a Gen Z, a K-pop fan, a practicing minimalist, a college student, a dancer, a reader, a philosopher, and an expert cuddler. My mom jokes that I’m “too much of a human.” I agree. There is a lot going on here. …
I’ve got curly, borderline-kinky brown hair, nerdy glasses, “biracial features,” and an androgynous minimalist fashion sense.
My name’s Oakley Phoenix. You can call me Oak. I like to avoid pronouns as much as possible, but you can use they/them for me if you need to.
I’m a full-time student, currently a sophomore in college. I’m from the Bay Area of California, and I go to school in Oregon. I’m majoring in women’s and gender studies with a double minor in english and sociology. I have three jobs on campus (tour guide, prospective student visit coordinator, and mascot manager — arguably the most fun jobs at my university). I’m in the BSU (Black Student Union), QTPOC (Queer Trans People of Color), and Rainbow Alliance (our all-inclusive GSA). …
I was not born Oakley Rae Phoenix. At exactly 5pm (Virgo alert!) on August 30th, 2001, I entered the world as Jaelin Rae Brun. “Jaelin” was a combination of my moms’ first names, and “Brun” was the last name of one of my moms.
To this day, I’m not quite sure where “Rae” came from because we always joked that it was from Miley Rae Cyrus…but I know that Hannah Montana didn’t exist in 2001.
My name was legally changed in the state of California on April 17th, 2020. Socially, I became Oakley full-time in January 2020. …
Genderchic is a new Medium publication for all those who are willing to own their genderqueerness. Our aim is to build a home for all genderqueer individuals to safely and unapologetically express ourselves on a publication that is dedicated solely to claiming our space within the queer community.
Genderchic is a publication built around the idea of owning our genderqueer truths: our bodies, our names, our pronouns, our stories of finding our selves. There is no reason for us to strike out on this grand endeavor on our own.
Walk with me down the Avenue of Great Ideas for a moment. …
Genderchic is a new Medium publication for all those who are willing to own their genderqueerness. Our aim is to build a home for all genderqueer individuals to safely and unapologetically express ourselves on a publication that is dedicated solely to claiming our space within the queer community.
Our publication color scheme is the genderqueer flag, and our tagline is Bring your own brick (BYOB) to throw at the walls of the gender binary, and make yourself at home. That sums it up well.
It is clear that genderqueer individuals are not the focus of many publications, and may be slipping through the cracks when it comes to building a following on Medium. Oftentimes, nonbinary individuals are confined to publications that are built to service the entirety of the LGBTQ2+ community or the entirety of the trans community (which seems to have a more binary than nonbinary presence on Medium). …
Severely Deficient Autobiographical Memory (SDAM) is “a lifelong inability to vividly recollect or re-experience personal past events from a first-person perspective.”
Highly Superior Autobiographical Memory (HSAM) is “the ability to accurately recall an exceptional number of experiences and their associated dates from events occurring throughout much of one’s lifetime.”
Episodic Memory is “a type of long-term memory that involves conscious recollection of previous experiences together with their context in terms of time, place, associated emotions, etc.”
Semantic Memory is “all of the general knowledge about our world that we accumulate throughout our lives…such as facts, ideas, meanings, and concepts related to our world.” …
This is me. I think it’s apparent I need to rethink my life a little bit.
Just kidding.
This is me eight years ago, on my first day of middle school. (My first paragraph is a Ratatouille reference in case that wasn’t clear. I loved that movie growing up, and I thought it only fitting to sneak in a mention of it.)
These days, I would not be caught dead in a pink Angry Birds shirt with a matching pink scrunchie and nail polish and a sequin bow with a matching black skirt. …
I am not a writer who can speak to the injustices of the world in an academic way. I recommend John Gorman or umair haque if that is what you wish to hear. What I can do is tell you how I, Oakley Rae Phoenix, am doing…am coping, to be more specific.
First, let me level set. I am a nineteen year old college student from the Bay Area. A Brown queer trans nonbinary young adult. An intermarginalized 2000s kid trying their best. (Don’t let my many labels scare you off. …
I’ll let you in on a secret: I’m tired of altering my presentation and my pronouns for the cisgender people in my life.
I’m nonbinary, a person who doesn’t fit into our society’s binary understanding of gender (man or woman). I’m transmasculine, a person who was assigned female at birth and has taken steps to present in a more masculine way to the general public. I’m gender non-conforming, a person whose gender expression varies greatly from day to day depending on which pieces of myself I want the world to see.
I’m also a people-pleaser and a conflict-avoider and someone who is quick to bend over backwards to make sure other people are comfortable and happy with me even if it means sacrificing my own needs. …
When I declared philosophy as my major back in November, I thought I was making the right call. I was just excited to finally know what my college path would look like. I declared philosophy alongside my three minors: english, sociology, and women’s and gender studies.
I chose to focus on philosophy because I loved the idea of learning about ethics and morality. What makes people care (or not care) about others. How we’re supposed to treat each other. What makes something right or wrong. How the gray areas in morality are able to be understood. …